OK, so it's after 4 am right now and I have just returned from a party that went horribly, horribly wrong. I am extremely tired right now but I thought this was something that could not wait until morning, (it's practically light soon anyway).
A friend and I decided to go to a party we were invited to earlier last week. He was not sure he wanted to go anymore but he called me a hour before it was slated to start, which was at 8 and said he changed his mind. I told him I was sleeping and tired but I would go with him. I really wish I had stayed in bed and didn't go. (I don't even know if I have the strength to write about this now.)
Initially we decided that we were not going to stay long. The last bus leaving downtown to where we lived was about midnight so I didn't carry any cash on me or anything because I didn't think I would need it. Students travel free. I did however bring my credit card. It wasn't of any use though.
The long and short of it was that there was huge, huge, HUGE major drug usage at that party. Almost every fucking person in there was using fucking drugs. MY GOD!! Everybody warned me that this college was known for it's drug usage but I thought that was just an unsubstantiated joke. I never thought that I would be ever placed in a position where I would have to deal with hardcore drugs. I WAS SO FUCKING WRONG!! I am so pissed at myself. At the beginning of the party everybody was drinking alcohol, which is pretty standard. I drank alot more than I should but people were getting freakin wasted early. I mean really wasted. Vomiting everywhere and shit. It was a mess. As the night progressed everyone there realized that I wasn't really one of them. And that's when they began to ostracize me. Even my fucking friend was ignoring me. If I went towards a group of people talking everybody would like immediately disperse and leave me there all myself. Nobody really came over and spoke to me even if I was standing there all by myself. Initially I thought that it was because I wasn't social enough. I really wanted to go home but slowly almost every fucking person in the party was loosing their god damn minds. I really didn't understand why but all I knew was that I REALLY WANTED to go. I didn't have any cash and the last bus home had left hours ago so I was stranded there at the mercy of my so called friend. I thought it was the alcohol at first but then I started talking to this really hot guy in the living room and he started mentioning all these drugs, cocaine, K (whatever that was) and a bunch of other shit that he was going to try. I was like what? Are you serious. He was out of his fucking mind already too. It was obvious he was doing drugs with everybody else. I didn't see them doing it but I know they were. Then a group of them were outside talking and then all of a sudden I see all of them staring at me. It was like they were talking about me and laughing. Then those that could not see me from outside came to the door and looked, laughed and then I knew that they were definitely talking about me. I was really hurt because "my friend" who was also outside with them and he was laughing too. All of them were laughing, talking and staring at me. I know they were like bashing me or whatever. I lost all respect for them at that moment. People I have class with and I spoke to were outside bashing me. I KNOW IT!!
When they all came in they all started treated me weird and NO ONE made eye contact with me. Yeah, whatever they were saying outside it must have been pretty nasty since none of them could look me in the eye. "MY friend" didn't even look at me either. I was like ok. At that point I really wanted to leave. I couldn't so I went outside to sit down by myself because I couldn't be around them anymore. I just sat in the cold by myself. When I came back inside all of them had gone upstairs. My friend however was still downstairs. He didn't look so good so I asked him if he was ok. He then like went off on me as if I had said something bad to him. He like cursed me off literally. They way he acted you would have sworn I killed his mother or something. It was so hurtful. I asked him if he was ready and he like said, "What the fuck is wrong with you. NOO!!!" I realized that he was doing the drugs like everybody else so I didn't get upset. Also I knew there were alot of people having sex upstairs too. So they were all doing drugs and having sex. THIS HAS BEEN THE WORST EXPERIENCE FOR ME HERE. People I have class with who should know better were doing it too. But what hurts the most is how everybody treated me. And it was alot of people. It really wasn't a small group at all.
To make matters worst is that while I was in the living room sitting down all by myself these two guys from another college came over and said to me, "We heard they were doing drugs here blah blah blah" I could see that they had been doing some shit too. They were out of their minds. They were coming from another party down the street according to them and got kicked out. This could not have gotten any fucking worst.
Everybody there was also smoking weed from early too. Finally after some persistence I told my friend we need to go. He wanted to crash at the house until morning but I told him he need to get home. I took his cash from him and called the cab to pick us up. He took so much shit that when he got out of the taxi the first thing he did was vomit right at the door. It was terrible. I wanted to make sure he got home ok so I walked him to his apartment, which was a distance off. He tried to apologize for his behaviour but honestly I didn't care. When he was in front of his friends he treated me like shit and now he tries to apologize. Anyway, when I saw that he got in ok, I walked back to my apartment in the dark, in the cold all by myself.
NEVER FUCKING AGAIN!! I can't believe they treated me like that. If I knew it was a drugs and sex party I would never have gone. I can't look these people in the face on Monday morning and still respect them. There is so much more that happened but I am not even going to write about it. It's almost 5 freakin am now.
A friend and I decided to go to a party we were invited to earlier last week. He was not sure he wanted to go anymore but he called me a hour before it was slated to start, which was at 8 and said he changed his mind. I told him I was sleeping and tired but I would go with him. I really wish I had stayed in bed and didn't go. (I don't even know if I have the strength to write about this now.)
Initially we decided that we were not going to stay long. The last bus leaving downtown to where we lived was about midnight so I didn't carry any cash on me or anything because I didn't think I would need it. Students travel free. I did however bring my credit card. It wasn't of any use though.
The long and short of it was that there was huge, huge, HUGE major drug usage at that party. Almost every fucking person in there was using fucking drugs. MY GOD!! Everybody warned me that this college was known for it's drug usage but I thought that was just an unsubstantiated joke. I never thought that I would be ever placed in a position where I would have to deal with hardcore drugs. I WAS SO FUCKING WRONG!! I am so pissed at myself. At the beginning of the party everybody was drinking alcohol, which is pretty standard. I drank alot more than I should but people were getting freakin wasted early. I mean really wasted. Vomiting everywhere and shit. It was a mess. As the night progressed everyone there realized that I wasn't really one of them. And that's when they began to ostracize me. Even my fucking friend was ignoring me. If I went towards a group of people talking everybody would like immediately disperse and leave me there all myself. Nobody really came over and spoke to me even if I was standing there all by myself. Initially I thought that it was because I wasn't social enough. I really wanted to go home but slowly almost every fucking person in the party was loosing their god damn minds. I really didn't understand why but all I knew was that I REALLY WANTED to go. I didn't have any cash and the last bus home had left hours ago so I was stranded there at the mercy of my so called friend. I thought it was the alcohol at first but then I started talking to this really hot guy in the living room and he started mentioning all these drugs, cocaine, K (whatever that was) and a bunch of other shit that he was going to try. I was like what? Are you serious. He was out of his fucking mind already too. It was obvious he was doing drugs with everybody else. I didn't see them doing it but I know they were. Then a group of them were outside talking and then all of a sudden I see all of them staring at me. It was like they were talking about me and laughing. Then those that could not see me from outside came to the door and looked, laughed and then I knew that they were definitely talking about me. I was really hurt because "my friend" who was also outside with them and he was laughing too. All of them were laughing, talking and staring at me. I know they were like bashing me or whatever. I lost all respect for them at that moment. People I have class with and I spoke to were outside bashing me. I KNOW IT!!
When they all came in they all started treated me weird and NO ONE made eye contact with me. Yeah, whatever they were saying outside it must have been pretty nasty since none of them could look me in the eye. "MY friend" didn't even look at me either. I was like ok. At that point I really wanted to leave. I couldn't so I went outside to sit down by myself because I couldn't be around them anymore. I just sat in the cold by myself. When I came back inside all of them had gone upstairs. My friend however was still downstairs. He didn't look so good so I asked him if he was ok. He then like went off on me as if I had said something bad to him. He like cursed me off literally. They way he acted you would have sworn I killed his mother or something. It was so hurtful. I asked him if he was ready and he like said, "What the fuck is wrong with you. NOO!!!" I realized that he was doing the drugs like everybody else so I didn't get upset. Also I knew there were alot of people having sex upstairs too. So they were all doing drugs and having sex. THIS HAS BEEN THE WORST EXPERIENCE FOR ME HERE. People I have class with who should know better were doing it too. But what hurts the most is how everybody treated me. And it was alot of people. It really wasn't a small group at all.
To make matters worst is that while I was in the living room sitting down all by myself these two guys from another college came over and said to me, "We heard they were doing drugs here blah blah blah" I could see that they had been doing some shit too. They were out of their minds. They were coming from another party down the street according to them and got kicked out. This could not have gotten any fucking worst.
Everybody there was also smoking weed from early too. Finally after some persistence I told my friend we need to go. He wanted to crash at the house until morning but I told him he need to get home. I took his cash from him and called the cab to pick us up. He took so much shit that when he got out of the taxi the first thing he did was vomit right at the door. It was terrible. I wanted to make sure he got home ok so I walked him to his apartment, which was a distance off. He tried to apologize for his behaviour but honestly I didn't care. When he was in front of his friends he treated me like shit and now he tries to apologize. Anyway, when I saw that he got in ok, I walked back to my apartment in the dark, in the cold all by myself.
NEVER FUCKING AGAIN!! I can't believe they treated me like that. If I knew it was a drugs and sex party I would never have gone. I can't look these people in the face on Monday morning and still respect them. There is so much more that happened but I am not even going to write about it. It's almost 5 freakin am now.
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I am proud of you for having stuck to your guns. Drugs is not something 'cool' for anyone to mess around with.
ReplyDeletePlease stick to your values regardless of what your friends think of you.
Your mum would be proud.
Thank you, that was very nice to hear.
ReplyDeletewow- rought nite. glad u made it out ok.... though u might be little scarred. glad some of their tru colors came through-at least now u know what u might get urself into with these ppl.
ReplyDelete