Friday, April 3, 2009

Surrounded by Assholes

God! Today was a hard day. Sometimes I wish I wasn’t surrounded by a bunch of Assholes. Why can’t the world be filled with nice, genuine and friendly people? Why does some little fuck think it’s kool to make other people feel bad about themselves? Save me from these people.

These people enrage me to no end. Even to the point where the only thing I think about is causing them some real physical harm. The thought of smashing their face in with a piece of plank is so pleasing that it scares me at times. What’s wrong with the world?

No matter how much I try I could never seem to develop a thick skin against verbal attacks. I can’t deal with it. And it hurts even more when I know that I put in the effort to be nice to everyone even when I don’t agree with some of the shit they do. And for someone who is supposed to be intelligent, all I want to do when I get upset is fight. Running them over with a car, taking a hammer to their skull or slashing their car tires would feel like such sweet justice. All I want to do is make them feel pain.

I don’t believe in violence but at times I think violence is the only way to teach these people a lesson.

What happened? Someone called me a name I didn’t like. And even though I know she was only doing it to get back at me for reporting her corrupt activities, it still hurts. She was cheating the company out of money and was encouraging other members to get involved, a few of which did. I could no longer over look it. Yes, I am gay and I know what people say shouldn’t really matter but all I wanted to do was tell her, “SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU LOW LIFE PIECE OF SHIT!!!”

After she told me that story about how she and her friends tormented that gay guy at the party, I knew I should have just avoided her. What they did was so fucking beyond cruel yet I still spoke to them. It sucks that I have to see her face again. They can go rot in hell for all I care. I swear, all I wanted to do was grab that knife and stab her.

I need to practice greater control over my emotions. I can’t afford to drop to their level.

Perhaps, one of these days I am just going to snap.

2 comments:

  1. You're just dying to get into prison arent u?! You know what they do to boys like you right?? Is that the reason? Is it coz ur not getting any :P

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  2. Thanks for that. It really placed a smile on my face. The situation got worst then better yesterday but I don't have the time or energy to write about it yet.

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