Sunday, November 8, 2009

Update on People Anxiety

So yesterday I spoke about how I think I was consciously sabotaging my relationships with current friends as well as with potential new ones. Well today it was evident that I am doing just that.

One of the guys I wrote yesterday, the one I begged to write me back if he was reading, did. In the email he said, "Sorry to have Bothered you". I read his email and shaked my head in dismay. I did it again. [Sigh]

I then wrote him back, explaining that it was never my intention to give him the impression that I was turning a cold shoulder. To which he responded, "I understand". I then said " I really hope you do. Don't be a stranger you seem to be a nice guy". It then took a turn for the worst, in which he basically thrown my kindness, or at least what I thought was kindness, back into my face....."If you can't make time for me then why should I make time for you. Just being real", he says. It sounded reasonable enough but the tone was all wrong. I have too much going on in my life to be concerned with the "drama" of a faceless individual. That friendship is pretty much dead in the water now for all I care.

Interacting with people you meet online can be so tricky. I never have any idea what they expect. And if it means I have to leave my comfort zone to let it work or you can't wait until I can leave my comfort zone then it's not going to happen between you and I. It's unfortunate yes, because many of these people "seem" nice but until I can trust you. You aren't getting shit from me.

Oh well relationship are not for everybody.

2 comments:

  1. We gay men sometimes have too much drama surrounding us. You obviously don't need a friendship that already has that much of vitriol at its basement.

    There are many men around who would respond better

    ReplyDelete